A Very long time ago when I first learned that shit was the brown stuff that I had been excreting for the past 24 years it also occured to me that I didnt know what shit was so I started to apply to be a either a guest or a cook for the craft services on the Dr Phil show which turned out to be a long and arduous proccess and I didnt even know if I was spelling arduous right or the fact that I didnt even know what it meant and it also occured to me that all this was disturbing beyond the normal parameters of disturbing so I never got around to filling out the application for the Dr Phil show instead I went to a gym and patted alot of people on the butt and one of them shit in my hand and I queried "WHAT THE FUCK DO I DO WITH THIS SHIT, BITCH?!" and then it all dawned on me and I suddenly knew the answer to every question I ever wanted to know except "What exactly was the purpose of Full House?" and that question should prolly never be answered because once it does Bob Saget would be forced to explain to us the use of Porcupine Balls and why they dont really give a shit because they‘re so small unlike the Cheeseburgers my dad always made me eat which were covered in BBQ sauce and I found out that its the only real food men eat which disturbed my mother which is why we no longer have sex.